By Ben Witherington
How many Presbyterians does it take to change a light bulb? None. God has pre-ordained when the lights will be on and when they will be off.
How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They always use candles.
How many Episcopalians does it take to change a light bulb??
Ten. One to actually change the bulb, and nine to say how much better they liked the old one.
How many Methodists does it take to change a light bulb??
"We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey, you have found that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship to your light bulb and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which
we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence through Jesus Christ."
How many Baptists does it take to change a light bulb???? CHANGE ????????????
Another variant: How many Baptist does it take to change a light bulb: 12. They formed a committee, couldn't decide whether to go with incandescent or florescent, split, and formed two new churches - one with all incandescent bulbs and one with all florescent bulbs!
How many United Churchers does it take to change a light bulb?
17. But the committee voted 9 to 8 to leave things the way they were.
How many Pentecostals does it take to change a light bulb? You don't change it; you pray that God makes the light miraculously come back on. If it doesn't, it's because you lack faith.
How many dispensationalists does it take to change a light bulb? One. But considering we're now living in the Fluorescent Age, he'll have to switch bulbs accordingly.
How many Amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Wir nicht verstehen Ihre Frage.
How many Episcopals does it take to change a light bulb? One will try; but the rest of them will discourage him, and hold a symposium in which they doubt the light ever existed in the first place, yet find some reason to justify calling the room "lit."
How many Presbyterians does it take to change a light bulb? None. God has pre-ordained when the lights will be on and when they will be off.
How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They always use candles.
How many Episcopalians does it take to change a light bulb??
Ten. One to actually change the bulb, and nine to say how much better they liked the old one.
How many Methodists does it take to change a light bulb??
"We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey, you have found that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship to your light bulb and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which
we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence through Jesus Christ."
How many Baptists does it take to change a light bulb???? CHANGE ????????????
Another variant: How many Baptist does it take to change a light bulb: 12. They formed a committee, couldn't decide whether to go with incandescent or florescent, split, and formed two new churches - one with all incandescent bulbs and one with all florescent bulbs!
How many United Churchers does it take to change a light bulb?
17. But the committee voted 9 to 8 to leave things the way they were.
How many Pentecostals does it take to change a light bulb? You don't change it; you pray that God makes the light miraculously come back on. If it doesn't, it's because you lack faith.
How many dispensationalists does it take to change a light bulb? One. But considering we're now living in the Fluorescent Age, he'll have to switch bulbs accordingly.
How many Amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Wir nicht verstehen Ihre Frage.
How many Episcopals does it take to change a light bulb? One will try; but the rest of them will discourage him, and hold a symposium in which they doubt the light ever existed in the first place, yet find some reason to justify calling the room "lit."
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