A Man, an Abortion, a Gospel

A Commentary by Russell D. Moore

Last night, in the electronic piles of emails that buzz along on my computer, one message stood out, with a glory much older than electronic technology. The message read (edited to remove names and particulars): "Dear Dean Moore, "I just finished listening to a broadcast of a recent Albert Mohler radio show where you served as guest host for Dr. Mohler. The program had to do with the treatment of abortion by Hollywood, and the question you repeatedly raised was how we can stand up for the truth that abortion is a sin, yet have compassion for those who have 'fallen' to this sin. "I was really touched by that because I am a 66 year old man who, 42 years ago before I was saved, helped a girl find an abortionist, paid for the abortion, and traveled with her to and from the abortionist. I thought I was the father, but later learned that I was not. At the time I was a doctoral candidate at an Ivy League school, and had a slew of incredible pressures on me: my father had recently died, cash was tight, and the Vietnam turmoil with its campus repercussions was going on. "I was so ashamed, yet, consciously was in denial about that shame until many years later. I was unable to concentrate as well on my studies, and seemed to be making poor decisions. I alienated a senior professor whose support I needed in order to proceed with my doctorate, I messed up a couple of important research papers, and after six years of graduate study, having completed all my course requirements, I left my program never to return. "I never understood it at the time, but later realized that the difficulties I had were a form of self-punishment and judgment from God for the sin I had committed. I was an accessory before, during, and after the fact of that murder of that innocent baby. In spite of my incredible education, I could not establish myself in any regular, gainful employment for eight or ten years after I left college. I wandered from place to place and from job to job, living in relative isolation and as an 'intellectual' wanderer. "However, as I became aware of myself as a sinner, I repented for the terrible wrong I had committed as well as other sins, and I received and believed in Jesus Christ (Jn 1:11-12), and the promised forgiveness. Today I have finally found peace with God. Your comments on the program were so true, so deep, so truthful, and so kind, I wanted to share my story with you. "If you want to use this testimony anywhere that's o.k. with me, although I'd appreciate it if you would not use my name, say, only referring to me by initials or some other way. And if you do use my story to further encourage other males who neither understood the deep effects that abortion had on them, nor just how sinful it really is, nor the Lord's great forgiveness in the face of admitted guilt and total repentance, I'd appreciate hearing about it."