Sunday, February 22, 2009

20 Qualities of Good Listeners

Gavin Ortlund @ offers some observations on what makes a good listener. Here are some of his points. See the full article for the explanations:

1) Good listeners consider a person's statements in relation to their presuppositions (as much as possible).

2) Good listeners are not hasty in making judgments.

3) Good listeners pay careful attention to words.

4) Good listeners ask questions.

5) Good listeners are not lazy.

6) Good listeners don't feel threatened by not controlling the conversation.

7) Good listeners understand that everyone has different communication styles, and adjust their listening to correspond to the speaker's communication style.

8) Good listeners interrupt intentionally and gently, rather than habitually and rashly.

9) Good listeners recall their own subjectivity and finitude as a listener.

10) Good listeners are willing to listen to something even if its hard to hear.

11) Good listeners do not unreasonably question the motives of the speaker.

12) Good listeners don't equate listening with agreeing.

13) Good listeners are not simply waiting to talk again when someone else is speaking.

14) Good listeners remember that you can learn from anyone.

15) Good listeners love people.

16) Good listeners pay attention to nonverbal communication without discounting verbal communication.

17) Good listeners are willing to speak.

18) Good listeners understand that every act of communication takes place in a context or setting.

19) Good listeners are willing to stop listening to something that is perverse, wicked, or dangerously foolish.

20) Good listeners understand how important listening is to a relationship.

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