How to disagree (humbly)

Guest blogger Mark Lauterbauch discusses how to disagree with other Christians, humbly.

I am thirty years down the road of studying the Bible and one of my lessons in those years is that certain things in the Bible are patently clear, and certain other convictions are established, but the vote is 5 to 4.

Among those things which are clear are the truth that God is the Creator of all things, the character of God, the nature of God in Trinity, the nature of Jesus as God-man, the doctrine of sin, the substitutionary atonement, the final authority of Scripture, the building of the church as the bride of Christ, and the personal return of Jesus leading to the new heavens and the new earth. We can also add basic commands for godliness and against ungodliness. Here and there, there are passages related to these doctrines that are not easily explained. But they are few.

Then there are doctrines about the mode of baptism, the governance of the church, the timing of Christ's return as related to the Tribulation, the nature of the Millennium, the nature of election and predestination, the details of Calvinism, the effects of sin upon the image of God, the continuation of spiritual gifts, plus innumerable issues of differing applications of the same principles. The list is quite long and these are a sample.

Here is what I have discovered in my own study: that when interpreting a text I am always prayerfully weighing out its importance as compared to other texts. And I am always seeking to harmonize texts. I must let the text speak from its context. But there are still times one passage seems to counter another.

I have come to see that the Bible is vast -- far greater than my mind can grasp -- and so I make conclusions with humility. What I do not want to do is force a text into my theology. What concerns me is when I begin to say something is "obvious" in scripture -- which, of course, questions the intelligence and godliness of those who disagree with me.

My son is a biochemist and the sum of all we know today in that field is beyond any one person's grasp and there is so much more to learn. If that is true of biochemistry, it is infinitely more true of the Word of the Living God which reveals God to us.

What I prefer to do is let the text of Scripture "vote." I do not mean that irreverently -- what I mean is that I do not want to force a text into a mold. I want to let it speak. Then I determine how its fits what I hold.
[Here’s an example: I hold to a conviction that Jesus will not come again to rapture the church at the beginning of the Tribulation (a la Left Behind). I hold to a position that the Millenium has already begun when Jesus sat at God’s right hand. There are passages which seem to make that clear in my mind and passages which I cannot fully explain. So I do not try to force the passages into my understanding, but let them “vote”—and sometimes my conclusion is won by a very narrow margin.

I say all this to say that humility requires me to submit to the Word and be faithful to it -- even if it leads me to conflicting conclusions. It requires me to be careful not to construct a house of doctrine out of only three texts and to emphasize what is clear and repeated. Humility also requires me to preach and teach faithfully what I see in the text as I pray and study -- and to argue the case for those views. But it calls me more so to focus on Jesus Christ and Him Crucified.

The gospel is the main thing. The gospel is where we draw the line in the sand first of all. It is a labor of sanctification to focus on the main thing and it is only in agreement on the main thing that we can have unity.

When Paul exhorted the Corinthians to be of one mind (1 Cor 1:8-15), he did not mean that they should agree about everything. When he spoke of the Romans (15:5) being of one mind, he meant that they would be in agreement on the Gospel even when they differed on various other points.

I find this very difficult. My heart is tempted to be proud and I tend to view those who disagree with me as in need of persuasion. They simply don't get it. At best it is because they are ignorant. So I will enlighten them! I quickly move from the gospel to secondary matters. Paul speaks of that pride in both Corinthians and Romans. It is the temptation to judge or despise, or to form our identity around a secondary.

My previous post gave the criteria for what I mean by gospel clarity -- not the repeating of a mantra, but a substantive presentation of the Gospel. It is agreement on the "core truth" that has always been the basis of determining who is our brother and how we treat them. Yet, ugliness has been all too common among members of the family and that ugliness is a matter of sin and not a matter of truth. We tend to take up unholy weapons in fighting holy wars.

Please note: It is not that we should be so naive as to think that we can all get along and be in the same church despite our differences. We dare not violate conscience or conviction out of supposed "unity.” Some convictions cannot work together. Thus it is good to advocate sovereign grace, believer's baptism, gender roles, our particular conclusions about the end of the age, and the continuation of the gifts. But we do so remembering where the life and death issue is: the gospel. We do so with humility.

Francis Schaeffer wrote The Mark of the Christian, and called God's people to show love to other believers even when we differ. Schaeffer had lived through one of the meanest fights in denominational history and it almost drove him to unbelief. We are not to act as though we do not differ, but we are to show honor to each other as fellow grace recipients through Christ.

Here is how I think we disagree in a way that honors the gospel:

1. Be quick to remember that this person is one with whom I will share in eternal glory around the Lamb.

2. Review with them the foundation of our salvation, and review it in detail. Review the stunning grace of God through Christ's death to undeserving sinners. Spend time reviewing how you each appreciate grace and what new ways it has melted your heart.

3. Be quick to hear the position of those you disagree with and make sure it is understood so well that they tell us we are stating it fairly. I like to begin my rebuttal while they are speaking but that is a mark of pride. Pride also results in false stereotypes, generalizations, and extreme examples.

4. Go to Scripture. How quickly we set aside our Bibles and simply talk theology with each other. Open the text. Walk through the text.

5. Watch against uncharitable judgments of motives, education, consistency, etc.


6. Perhaps agree to disagree. But go to learn as well as to make a point.

Then stand for your convictions and argue your case. This is not a call to wimpiness. It is a call to remember who are enemies are and who are friends.

Last, end with a reminder of the undeserved grace of God to sinners such as ourselves; and rejoice that some day we will all agree.

The result of all this will be Gospel unity demonstrated in how we treat those who differ with us but are also in Christ. It will also be the preservation of Gospel compromise from those who would alter the message. And all that will be to the glory of God and salvation of God’s people.

Mark Lauterbach is senior pastor of Grace Church in San Diego, CA and blogs at GospelDrivenLife