Something light for the start of the week....

Tim Hawkins on Babies, marriage, childhood and...teenagers

Tim Hawkins on Worship Music

Tim Hawkins "Different Churches"

Tim Hawkins - Hedge of Protection

Tim Hawkins-Scary Bedtime Prayer

Humour:"Biblical Curse Generator"

Lost for a smart remark to see off your enemies? Unable to deliver that killer insult? Put an end to unscriptural restraint with the amazing Biblical Curse Generator, which is pre-loaded with blistering smackdowns as delivered by Elijah, Jeremiah and other monumentally angry saints. Simply click the button below, and smite your foes with a custom-made curse straight out of the Old Testament! Top | SOF home

Humour: Because Monday's are hard for some people:

Study Bibles that are NOT coming out

iMonk @ http://www.internetmonk.com pulls out the comedy stops to suggest Study Bibles for particular authors. He lists:

The Phil Johnson “PoMotivator” Study Bible.

The Tim Challies Clearly Canadian Discernment Study Bible.

The Al Mohler Encyclopedic Punditry Study Bible.

The Abraham Piper 22 Words Study Bible.

The Steve Hays Study Bible.

The Jared Wilson Stay-At-Home-Dad Study Bible.

Van Til’s Animals in Scripture Study Bible.

The “Reason for a Study Bible” Study Bible, edited by Tim Keller.

The Mark Driscoll R-Rated Study Bible for Dudes.

The Paula White “What the….” Study Bible.

The Boar’s Head Tavern Study Bible, edited by Matthew Johnson and Bill Mackinnon.

The Internet Monk Mongrels and Evangelicals Study Bible.

Maybe labels have some use.

No, This does not count as a "call to preach".

Why Psychologists Aren't Hired As Lifeguards

We all need Biblical Literacy

If a modern day preacher were Moses

Friday Humour

Not the real Patrick

Short Pants Dance

Eloise - Who Ya Worshippin'?

Top Twenty Theological Pick-up Lines NOT to use

By C Michael Patton @http://www.reclaimingthemind.org

Seeing as how I used to be a singles pastor, I thought that I would give you some of the tips that I gave my singles on how NOT to lure the right one to your side.

20. ”I am not overweight. The word ‘glory’ in Hebrew is kabod which according to HALOT literally means ‘heaviness.’ The Bible also says that we are to reflect God’s glory. Therefore, I am just doing what the Bible says.”

19. “Looking at you makes me reconsider preterism, because you are heaven on earth.”

18. “Paul said that it was better to marry than to burn. Therefore, I am under God’s mandate to marry you.”

17. “Here, let me take care of those tithes.”

16. “You may not have chosen me, but I have chosen you.”

15. “I could not help but notice you were exegeting me instead of the text during the sermon.”

14. ”Your name must be grace, because you are irresistible.”

13. ”There are six things that motivate me to talk to you, yea seven that turned my head.”

12. “Until this moment, I thought I had the gift of singleness.”

11. During communion say, “Can I get you another drink.”

10. “The Bible says that God is not concerned with outer appearance . . . neither should you.”

9. “The Good Book said that I might be visited by angels unaware, but something must be wrong with my interpretation, because I am perfectly aware of you.”

8. “I noticed you crying during alter call, can I help?”

7. While giving her a TULIP say, ”This Totally depraved person has been Unconditionally drawn to you, Limiting himself to your Irresistible beauty that is Persevering beyond all others.”

6. “God may be the bread of life, but you are the butter.”

5. “The site of you leaves me apophatic.”

4. “Well, gouge out my eyes and cut off my hands. If I hang around you much longer, I won’t have any limbs left.”

3. “You must have missed The Fall line, because you are lookin’ righteous.”

2. Sing this to the tune of George Strait’s “Chair”: “Excuse me, but I think you’ve got my rib.”

1. “Are you homo or homoi?”

Humour: Nursery catacombs idea flops

From Larknews @ http://www.larknews.com

ARVADA, Colo. — Fountain of Life church’s new children’s ministry coordinator was supposed to freshen up the kids ministry to compete with the nearby mega-church’s PlayLand-style children’s area. But turning the church basement into the Catacombs Kids Club flopped with children and parents.
"We wanted kids to step into the lives of first-century Christians in a mysterious, cool environment," says Katie Mendoza, 23, a recent Bible school graduate who had staked her short career on the idea. "With Pirates of the Caribbean being so popular, we thought dungeons would be fun."
But when the Catacombs Kids Club was unveiled, kids began to cry and begged to go to "big church" with their parents.

Where not to go this summer!

Humour from http://tominthebox.blogspot.com

LYNCHBURG, VIRGINA

Looking for a place to take the family for vacation? Now look no further than Finney Land! Finney Land will be a full service family fun park complete with rides, games and shows set to open in 2009.

-Ready for a scare? Then take ride on the Anxious Seat roller coaster.

-Want to practice your shooting skills? Head over to the Cock n' Aim at Calvin shooting range, and see if you can hit the mark.

-Is the weather getting you hot? Cool off by riding down Warren's Wave into the huge baptistery. Didn't get wet enough the first time? No problem. You can ride as many times as you like until you get it right!

And don't forget to take the time to catch special appearances by our park characters, including Jacobus Arminius, and Charles Finney himself!

And, you won't want to miss Caner's Tree Stump show on the weekend with special appearances by Ergun Caner!

Be sure to look in specially marked boxes of Arrr-mini-ohs for your chance to win free tickets!

All the fun begins on May of 2009. Mark your calendar, and make plans now to visit Finney Land.

The park is open to anyone, but only you can choose to come. Make your decision today!

You don't need "Luck"